It’s a new thing, not knowing what I what to write about. Hence my last couple of posts seeming very scattered to me. It’s a new thing not having clear messages to myself in this little chapter in my life.
And so, whilst I learn to just flow as is, I figured it’s as good a time as any to send out some gratitude. For, as I’ve always had to remind myself, the journey is what it’s all about, not the destination.
Almost every night before I close my eyes and open my ears to the croaking frogs outside, I write in my gratitude diary and I write until I find a smile or a bigger smile. These are some if the things about which I am blessed that I can write…
I live in a world full of love. I am surrounded by love from near and afar, by people wanting me to succeed and wanting me to be true to myself. When I falter, their faith in me doesn’t and when I am strong, they grin along for the ride. There are people who I thought I’d lost and people who I thought I’d lose on this new journey. And every day I am grateful that I’ve underestimated connections in my life. And I am grateful that I feel those connections every day, without any trauma or crises to draw them back into focus.
I live in a world of history and fresh starts. I may have seemingly wiped the slate clean on a lot of things by coming to Australia four years ago, but not on the important things. I still have history where it matters, a place from which to track progress, and a clean slate from which to start the next chapters. For that balance, I am eternally grateful.
I have words and people who care what they represent. I have people who have heard the shifts in how I verbalise my world over decades and people who are developing my vocabulary in priceless directions each day. It is the way I used to be a chameleon and it is now the way I hedge my way into my truths. I have words and they are, in the main, soft and open for everyone else. And now I aim to make them so for myself too.
I have sight and, from that sight, perspective. I have had opportunities to see the profound physicalities of poverty and the wistfulness of over-abundance and the land that lies between. I’ve seen culture writ large in stereotypes and individualities expressed in beautifully subtle nuances. I’ve seen pain and heartache and seen full-belly-and-body joy. And I know what I want to see more of and how many amazing paths there are out there to explore.
I have choice and oh what choices there are. Sometimes the plethora and the depth of implications behind those choices can make it seem like a burden but they’re not. It’s amazing how I’ve taken that view before, in a protective stance. And actually all it’s ever done is rob me of the happiness in acknowledging that whatever happens, if I don’t like it, it can be undone to some extent. And whichever way you go, there is always something amazing to be gained from it and something equally amazing that will come from it, if only you keep your eyes open for the opportunities. After all, who am I to dictate that one path is so much better than the other if the universe flows otherwise?
I have my health. I know too many people who yearn to say that from every cell in their body. And I will do all I can to help them. And one of the most important things I can do, to respect their journey, is to not take my good health for granted. And furthermore, to protect it by exercise, eating and thinking right and appreciating all that it brings me.
Today I don’t know what to write but may I always know what to give thanks for.