Have you found recently that, when you sit back and ponder on it, you have been looking for signs and meanings all around you all your life? There were days in my past that I would sink noticing if I walked over three drain covers or would congratulate myself in being perceptive enough to avoid walking under a ladder, as if it really mattered. I always used to be sucker-punched by my dreams. I always used to think that every single one had a prophesy element to them. For surely, if I could remember them, it was because there was a message of something upcoming that I was supposed to be ready for. They always meant that there was something happening in my experience that I was ignoring or missing. It never once occurred to me that there was something inside of me that required some attention.
Have you ever noticed that, when you’re having a bad day, ordinary things seem to take on a new significance? Suddenly the ‘bad’ things that are happening are all aimed directly at you, ‘why me’ seems to wail from your cells at the world. Suddenly, the sun doesn’t seem so bright or too bright and only drama seems to beckon. Have you ever noticed that on those days, you may suddenly turn to the horoscopes page in the newspaper/ stare at the black cat (that you would have never seen on any other given day)/ or remember some random dream you had last night and wonder at the significance?
Have you ever noticed that on an amazing day, you will feel untouchable. You will soar above the multitudes and your very being will sing. But if anything takes the wind out of your sails, and you float down again, once more your focus will be on the anomalies or the quirks to try to find out what it all means.
Have you ever noticed how much power all this ‘significance’ this robs you of? It means, on a bad day, your day will get better or worse based on what you happen to encounter that day. Not what you choose to think, not what you do to mitigate the day, just everything else that is swirling around outside of you and beyond your control. You hand your power to the door you walk into, the heel that you break, the traffic that stops and the coffee that spills. It places your perception in the hands of others as you ask them what you should do and what the day means in the bigger picture.
I was reminded of a phrase on Sunday:
There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so. – William Shakespeare
On Sunday I was reminded that nothing has any more significance than you attribute to it. There is no innate power in anything beyond that which you designate, no message in something more than you wish it to carry. We all live our own significance, and the biggest journey of all is to bring that back inside of us with mindfulness and compassion.